Beauty for ashes
This morning I was taking a hard look at all the years I wasted living for myself and doing only things that pleased me without giving God so much as a thought. At the end of the day, I may have thrown up a prayer to God as I was drifting off to sleep. I was held captive by so many things. The weight of my sin and going my own way was so heavy on me. I cringe at some of the decisions I made and the actions that followed. I look back at see how wretched and filthy I was. I had head knowledge of Jesus and believed He died on the cross for my sins. I believed that He was the only way to God. Yet, I was only going through the motions. I went to church and sometimes did good things for others, but I lived like the rest of the world. I was no different than someone who was not "saved." I may have been religious on the outside, but inside, I was dead! All of those wasted years, God was so patient with me and He knew exactly what it would take to bring me to my knees. I remember crying out to Him on my knees on my bathroom floor. I hated myself, I hated who I was....I was miserable! About a month after that, God moved in my life. In February of 2008, I had to have emergency gall bladder surgery. I was in the hospital for five days. God knew what it would take for me...after I got home from the hospital, I had lots of time to think, to be alone with God. I opened up my Bible and "happened" to start watching the Christian network "TCT." I put the word "happened" in quotes, because this did not just happen...God intervened. He heard my cry for mercy! He removed the veil so I could see Him for who He really is! I am reminded of the verse in Job, "My ears had heard of You, but now my eyes have seen You." 42:5 God has restored to me the years the locusts have eaten. He has taken all my guilt and shame and He has bestowed on me "a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair." Isaiah 61:3 When I begin to get discouraged at the circumstances in my life or when things do not go the way "I" want them to, I remind myself of where I once was and how God rescued me from the pit. He is the only one who could have done this. He is the only one who can take your sin and shame and set you free. How I praise Him for new life and how He makes us a new creation in Christ. With the Psalmist I say "The Lord is my strength and my song; He has become my salvation." 118:14
"Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I obey Your word. You are good and what You do is good; teach me Your decrees." Psalm 119:67-68 You may be going through a trial right now and wonder why it is happening or where is God in all of this, but my friend, He is right there in your midst and everything He does, He does for your good and for His glory. No, we may not understand it, but we can trust the One who holds our world together. He is faithful, and He will bring you through it, He will never let you go. Be honest with the Lord about how you feel, He already knows anyway. I am praying that you and me will continue to say "it was good for me to be afflicted so that (we) might learn Your decrees. The law from Your mouth is more precious to (us) than thousands of pieces of silver and gold." Psalm 119:71-72 And remember that "He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." Philippians 1:6
"Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I obey Your word. You are good and what You do is good; teach me Your decrees." Psalm 119:67-68 You may be going through a trial right now and wonder why it is happening or where is God in all of this, but my friend, He is right there in your midst and everything He does, He does for your good and for His glory. No, we may not understand it, but we can trust the One who holds our world together. He is faithful, and He will bring you through it, He will never let you go. Be honest with the Lord about how you feel, He already knows anyway. I am praying that you and me will continue to say "it was good for me to be afflicted so that (we) might learn Your decrees. The law from Your mouth is more precious to (us) than thousands of pieces of silver and gold." Psalm 119:71-72 And remember that "He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." Philippians 1:6
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